Sunday, July 26, 2009
Feels as if it might sound sad,complex.
But the day it happened I felt as any other day cause it was something that not only me but my other 9999 colleauges had been anticipating.And I thought I wont feel bad as this happened not because I had screwed something up horribly but it was because my company's CEO had SCREWED everything.
"We all were but lambs in the flock,pebbles in the water heavy enough to have an identity but not heavy enough to stop being pushed by the river."
Somehow the initial phase got through.
Facing family,facing loved ones.facing neighbours,then the shopkeepers,then the distant relatives,the barber,the tea wallah,the landlord,the curious onlooker and finally facing myself.
But then somewhere its the toughest.
Knowing when you are all good but being in the few who got laid Off or rather FIRED.
I knew I would never feel bad or sad or torn or broken cause I knew it never was my fault.
But then the GLOOM came.It writhed,cried,shouted spread its shroud and came for me.It stuck my love first and then my friends and all those who were in this layoff wonderfully called as sabbatical.
I knew one day this would happen.One day all my loved ones,those who cared for me would be in shambles because of this situation.
But I knew I would fight all cause I had no choice of sitting and crying.There is this wonderful crux in life.You come out at your best after a head on collision.Sounds absurd but thats it.
I knew one thing that if there is anyone who would KNEEL,it would be life and not me,and I made it sure enough.
I called my friends who were in the same boat as me.And together we saw the new hope that seemed so clear,which was always there but never visible.
I had found a body to my dreams.Finally I could opt for higher studies that I had been waiting for so long.
There is this wonderful way of making ourselves happy.We say all happens for a reason,all happens for good.Although we just settle down with the newer things and console ourselves.But still it is essential as it keeps us the way we are,else we would have lost long back.
All is transparent now,specklessly transparent and I am here standing in arms,arms wide spread.
I have withered one more storm.Come life I am ready with my sword.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Besides the cradle
Even being a rat
I writhed like a snake
Damn these humans
I knew so well
Damn their ways
which I had seen so well
my last escape had been so perfect
missing the snare by inches of neglect
I knew that I wont come back
I knew I wont let my greed attack
Oh these people
who are smart like hell
Oh my glutton
it overcame even death lull
see what you have done
why din't you intervene
what makes you so wanted
what makes you enchanted
I forgot that I have a head to save
I forgot that there are things so strange
for which even the stomach should wait
But what can I do to cry for the past
I can just wait till my last breath lasts
Oh here he comes with a brick so big
In a few minutes I would be reduced to wick
I am closing my eyes with all my strength
Cause I just can't see him squashing my health
Hey whats happening
I still am safe
Hey the child is laughing
from the confines of the cradle
The man is watching at the child so pure
A smile is pouting at the man who had an evil galore
He is opening the snare for me
He is helping so that I be free
What a perfect escape
for my chance to run
I would never come back
for the greed so big
so off I go
with my saved head
so off I go
for a life so good
But hey let me just take the cheese
one last time
let me just take the cheese
one last time
Life is so analogus to this rat's tale.
We mostly mess up things by going the wrong ways,following vices,evils and end up at the wrong place.
But life gives us chances to come out of everything,to start afresh.
But as Captain Patch says:
"Habit is the second nature of man.
A dew rain drops,a few intimidations are enough for us to fall back and give in to those vices."
But thats where the test comes,to stay away from that enchanted block of cheese,to stay away from listening to the stomach.
Although sounds right and logical but as Max payne says:
"Logic IS the biggest liar".
I couldn't agree to him more.
So might be one last time....
Written for 3ww.The words being:Cradle,Perfect,Snare
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Sitting at the tip of my bed I couldn't do much rather than hearing to the perennenial onslaught of the daylong drizzle that had been reverbrating through the day.
Watching the rain drip through the windows, I turned back.
Turned back to be caught in her hypnotic gaze.A split second and I felt as if I was lost in her.
With riots playing havoc outside when she knocked at my door for safety I couldn't say no.
Now as we both were stranded in my house,I wasn't able to say much.
Wasn't able to quiet understand when the world was sulking over stupid matters of religious orthodoxy how could I be lost in a complete world of my own.
Finally tried to tell her what I had been feeling inside.
But no it wasn't the right time,as she was vulnerable today.The horrifying scenes of people trying to rape her were stilll fresh from yesterday.
I would surely say what I had kept inside me for years,but maybe someday when she would be angst free,free to laugh, free to follow her heart.
Someday when she would be in her full strength to contemplate rather than to hear with fear.
Till then I would just take care of her.
Friday, July 3, 2009
the fall of articles
the angst of religions
the collapse of narrow mindedness
We stood together
together in pain
together in love
The pain that I had to live
for the love so sweet
The answers that I had to give
for the questions so queer
Criminal I was called
for what I liked in my bed
Rebel i was labelled
for showing the love in my head
Am I questioned only because
our sex is same
Am I questioned only because
I am a One called a GAY
Is that a crime
to yearn for my love
Is that a crime
to marry one with feelings so same
Yes I couldnt love another girl
Like you all did
Yes I couldnt cheat another person
Like many of you did
My love was pure
And I was so sure
So we waited and waited
Till people serenaded
lovers eloped and hated
But we still waited and waited
To let my family know
that my love for you is real
To let my society feel
That my feelings are not surreal
We had to fight all dear
We stood death threats
We stood years of lockup
We stood the distance
We stood all
To stand to see the new day
To stand to see the new life
Dear,now all know
that our love is real
Now all know
That its not mad to love like this
Its not an illness to kiss like this
We needn't be ashamed
We needn't be labelled hideous
Coz now all know that our love is for real
Our love is for real
This weeks 3ww being-Collapse, Sweet, Yearn
Written keeping in view the change in Article 377 in INDIAN constitution.
Now Homosexuality is not considered as a crime as it was earlier labelled.
This one is for freedom of choice,freedom of not being booked for what you do in your bed,
freedom for not being punished for your sexual preferences.