the weight of my tears

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The man behind the 3ww,(the prompt for which I wait with baited breath for all seven days,where I have met the most interesting writers)Thom G lost his father the past week.

My respect and sympathies for him.

Tc Thom.

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I turned back unable to control my tears.

I turned back not to let her know ever,

that even in this man there were traces,

traces scarred deep by the pangs of emotions,

portrayed by my sullen tears...

Grappled but not long enough to take my hanky out

Grappled but not long enough,not to let my tears pout

But the hanky was all thick

carrying signs of the passing time's wick

My past gloom,my past cries

My heart breaks and losses deep

All neatly cornered and beautifully creased

The hanky aged heavy unable to be creased

I searched it more

tried to hide like I always tried

in the days of yore

And then felt the drift

felt her hands in the mist

She looked straight through

And i knew it down true

Now a hanky won't be needed

and that was all that her eyes pleaded 

Yes,now a hanky won't be needed

Written for 3ww-Hanky,Thick,Drift


~Harsha

Dilemma

Sitting at the tip of my bed I couldn't do much rather than hearing to the perennenial onslaught of the daylong drizzle that had been reverbrating through the day.

Watching the rain drip through the windows, I turned back.

Turned back to be caught in her hypnotic gaze.A split second and I felt as if I was lost in her.

With riots playing havoc outside when she knocked at my door for safety I couldn't say no.

Now as we both were stranded in my house,I wasn't able to say much.

Wasn't able to quiet understand when the world was sulking over stupid matters of religious orthodoxy how could I be lost in a complete world of my own.

Finally tried to tell her what I had been feeling inside.

But no it wasn't the right time,as she was vulnerable today.The horrifying scenes of people trying to rape her were stilll fresh from yesterday.

I would surely say what I had kept inside me for years,but maybe someday when she would be angst free,free to laugh, free to follow her heart.

Someday when she would be in her full strength to contemplate rather than to hear with fear.

Till then I would just take care of her.

Written for 3ww -Drip,Hypnotic,Sulk

~Harsha

Love I will,yes I will

This weeks 3ww being
Cryptic
malign
Flash

Of all the languages love is the most cryptic of all,coz I too am never able to understand my own heart.
I say so because I have fallen in love a number of times.
I too have felt betrayed a thousand times.
When,I fell,I felt lost,stabbed,kicked.
Felt broken..
And thought would never love again,even when SHE left me.
Felt that although she doesn't love me but I still do.
And even thinking about anyone else wud be an offense.
Felt that wud never love any1 else,wud never malign my heart...

Thought and thought...And then there was one flash...
And she was there.
She showed me care,like no one ever did.
She admired me,she caressed me,she stood by me,she believed in me.
She made me believe in myself.
She made me feel loved.
And then I loved,loved like I never had before.
Was pure,pious.

Now,I know a fall in the way doesn't mean the end of the road.
A fail in a day doesnt mean the end of the life.
What all I know is that I will be true,true to my soul,till I can be.
Rest is in her hands.Rest as they say is in her hands.
So,just keep loving and keep living.
The one who would love you would always be good than the one who left you.
Thats life and that's love.

~Harsha

Is this love dat seems to stay

Is this love dat seems to stay
or would you kick me out of your way
like others
like others
I have fallen down before
on my knees like a dumb man sore

i can cry and will only cry
O' please dont you even try to BE Sly

I will give you everything

I have eyes that have been crying
I have a soul thats deep down bleeding

you can see my torn down heart
waving hands in my blood stained shirt
I have called you love before
And I have been stung by love before

A lot of try and after a lot of heart
I again assauged the courage to call you my sweetheart

O' please dont make me feel like a second fiddle
O' please dont make your feelings for me chimerical
O' please dont make this relation ephemeral

I dont want it to be a frisson
Coz my love is not an abrasion

It was under your aegis
That I smiled back
It was under your aegis
That i lived life back

But now you tell me that although you love me
there are things reserved but not for me
But now you tell me that although you love me
there are feelings reserved but not for me

you have loved some one so hard I understand
Coz all have pasts that I too had

But my love for you was not a cost of the so called past
Then why you even today put him a step above making me the last

Why the loves confessions that you sang to him
end up as a melancholy refrain for me
Why the 'I love you' time and again for him
end up as a desserted echoing tunnel for me

Tell me dear did I ever put you second
Tell me dear Did I even in my dreams gave you lesser importance
Tell me dear Did you even feel that somewhere I lacked substance
Tell me dear did I ever stifle my feelings where you were concerned

There is only one thing that I can say
i can cry and will only cry

I cant come and slap you like others
I cant come and fight with you like others

I cant muddle your name
Else I too would be a cheap jerk same

I can do only thing dear
And thats cry and cry every single tear
Please dont leave me dear
Coz I can cry and only cry


~Harsha

SAGA of an “INTENSE” lover

Again one more outing for 3ww.
The words are
CRUSH
KNACK
VARIED
Tried my hand at humour



hey here she comes
Hold your breath man
see the way she turns

hey here she smiles
Stop your work man
look at the way she blinks

hey those eyes
ask me would you kill me
or should I die

I saw you by the road
felt like a new abode

Wanted to marry you right there then
Wanted to call you love's lost incarnation

People said foolish man
You seem to have lost your marbles
She is just a crush that you fathom
Like for every other girl who seems a bit glam

but I said NO
said,Foolish you go
Or will call you a crow
Coz I love her
and thats one thing I know

Made plans to amaze her
threw surreptitious glances and waved her
She seemed to look away
might it be that yes was something she had to say


Made plans to amuse her
cracked japes to bring her laughter
She tried to act as if I was a joker and dint stay
might it be that she felt love was the only way

I knew I had the knack
I knew she won't turn her back
Although her mind seemed varied
I believed one day I would have her tarried

Wore a good dress with flowers in my hand
the suit that I wore complemented her wonderful arm band
In all my mind and a poetic stand
recited a couplet and asked her hand

Hand she gave but not in my hand
A slap so hard made my cheek dark red
Oops I said and walked past hard

Crushed was my heart and
Crushed was my love
There WAS my crush
who left me in a crush

Knack I thought
which I have had
but after this bout
only the pain varied

Sad I was
and sat by the road
Sad I was
and thought not to find abode

But,hey who is on the road
with the wonderful eyes
But,hey who is on the road
with that wonderful smile

Knack is there but needs to be polished
Crush is there who seems so varied
Love will stand where the crush is standing
Hey you beauty wait I am coming


HARSHA

ENVY

Just saw this photo of kitchen drama on every photo tells a story THE PHOTO



How a child feels when he sees his love share being divided with his sibling




There is my mother
and there is my brother
I love my mother
and I love my brother

Brother now cries
mother please make some fries
Coz I am hungry
after hitting a sundry

You loved me so much
you hugged me with a wonderful touch
With my bit of things to munch
washing me keeping away the stench

But now only I love you
Coz he is the one whom you love
and now I only want you
coz he is the one whom you want


Now I will drench the cat
To make you listen
and I will shoot little brother
To make you know
That I too am hungry
of love like my brother


But I still love you
The way I love my brother
So I will shoot little brother
with my toy water shooter
I will drench the cat
with water in the pitcher

Mom please make some fries
coz I am hungry
like sweet little brother


HARSHA

And when d gazelle grazed

And when d gazelle grazed
in the end of the moonlit course
where the fauna flew high
under the orchid moon
beneath the tinkle of the rainbow
at d tip of a serpentine road
with twinkling stars
and tranquil flowing water
and dere wid d hush of d stars
i can see you
wid dose gleaming eyes
glistening in d dark
waiting 4 me wid arms ajar
wz thnkng sumthng where i saw u,
tht 2 tell u d same,
tht 2 make u feel the same,


Was it a second’s feeling
Or was it an eternity’s wait
All I know was that it was none but you
Have met u before and know I would meet you again
But have always felt, that this is not today we met
Its not before 6 months we met
But it has been ages since I know you
It was not in this world
But a thousand incarnations back
Coz all I remember is but you
Coz all I remember is just plain you

Now you are not here
Here with me
But all I know is one thing
All I know is you
Fresh in my memory like the morning dew
I still can feel you, hold you

Cause your place is but with me
Come in to my arms cause I can still see you
Come just as you were
And let us be one

The way we always were

Together in this moonlit night

when the gazelle grazed

cause I can see none but you

only you....

Harsha

Why should I love

Yesterday nyt I was walking back home from my office in the same way as I always do.

Came out, had dinner,stretched, catched my bus and came finally at the end of the deserted road where I live.

To save a few bucks I have taken my abode in the outskirts(countryside).

When others question me why, I intellectualy answer them that I luv to be near mother nature :D ....

Well,yesterday was the same like all the days.I stepped down from the bus with the thumping music safely tucked silently with the help of my earphones.

It was a picturesque sight,wonderful wind was blowing,there was the majestic "full moon" shining with all its valor.Some water pipe got broken in the morning which was now safely repaired and in place.With the breeze blowing,earthly smell of sand as if soaked in the first drops of rain made it all look so beautiful.After so many days I felt actually connected to nature.

And then I saw,something which I had seen before in fact always but yes never noticed it.

And today it just stopped me.

There standing in front of me was :-the small but beautifully carved shallow

"pit".

My only midnight companion.

Well,its not that I haven't seen him before,but there was something deep down that struck me today.

Water from the pipe had made its way in that small pit and it now had become a puddle.

And here was the place that had caught my attention.

In this small puddle I could see the magnificient "moon" in all its glory.

So beautiful,so lovable.

And then I saw the pit standing with its head held high and me being its only companion smiling a smile which in no way could stop the oozing happiness that it was witnessing.

And it knew that I would understand,and yea I understood.

I knew that he had loved the moon since his birth.

He always wanted the moon to be his.

I being an honest friend told him that this can't be ,because she was "The Moon" and he an ordinary pit.

But he never listened to me.

"I had left my battle to make him realize the truth after he made me realize that the truth was what he told."And then I believed him.

And today he was smiling back coz he had but the Moon herself.The trust was not broken.

Happy I was INDEED,to know that my friend now had the love of his life.

Happily I bid them adieu and started walking back.But heading home I realized something.

I had started to believe what I was not made to believe.And slowly the gravity of the situation settled in.

I realized that my companion had not realized in the midst of his dreams that this love was not meant to last forever.It was there to stay but for a small time.

I knew that the puddle would be vanished by the morning.

And there would be my friend alone miserable,sad,clinging to his melancholy trefrain.

I thought of running back to him and warn him of the impending sorrow.

But as I turned back I saw them both cuddled together in the most intimate position making love,deep in each other beaming with sheer radiance.

Seeing them engrossed so much,seeing such pure unbounded unbiased love all I could do was smile.

I just din't have the heart to tell my friend the truth.

I just turned back and with even more sadness and walked to my place.

Whole night sleep evaded my eyes.

Whole night I kept fighting with the turmoil inside me,whether to tell him or not.

Somehow I overcame the night.And in the bustle of the morning ran to office.

Was reprimanded by my manager because of my absentism at work.

But how could I have concentrated when the only thought that ran thru my headwas of my friend.

Somehow I finished my days work eager to meet my friend ran back.

It was nearly the same time as the previous night.

And I waded to meet my pal.The bus came to a screeching halt pulling me out of my reverie.

Today there was no music but the pitch black silence.

And then at the end of the road I could see him at a distance.

Standing......waiting for me.

I dint know how I would console him.....how I would hold his trembling hands,

or how I would wipe his weeping eyes!!!!

Accumulated all my strength and walked towards him,and yes..... there he was not a puddle but a pit.I felt that the worst of my fears had come true!!!!

But against my thinking.....to my utter disbelief ....I saw my companion still standing smiling.!!!

I ran to him as I felt a sense of relief !!!!

Before I could say anything he understood my concern.

He smiled again and said

"Dear Harsha.... I know you might be feeling worried ...coz today my beloved moon is not with me....But my friend I got my love for whom I waited all my life!!!! We had the best time when we were together....We loved as if there was no tommorow......lost in each other....Even death would seem smaller.......

And know what..... I still deeply love her as the way she does.

She told me that she had reasons and her family would never want us together.

But still she would always love me.Love me the way I loved her deep,pious.

I understood her reasons,her truth and she understood my compulsions.

And even tonight she is for me,and me for her."

And sure enough I raised my head and saw the moon hurling kisses at my companion...

And every night I pass through my friend but I dare not disturb him as he is still engrossed talking with his love silently.....