The day I lost my joB

The day I lost my joB.
Feels as if it might sound sad,complex.
But the day it happened I felt as any other day cause it was something that not only me but my other 9999 colleauges had been anticipating.And I thought I wont feel bad as this happened not because I had screwed something up horribly but it was because my company's CEO had SCREWED everything.
"We all were but lambs in the flock,pebbles in the water heavy enough to have an identity but not heavy enough to stop being pushed by the river."
Somehow the initial phase got through.
Facing family,facing loved ones.facing neighbours,then the shopkeepers,then the distant relatives,the barber,the tea wallah,the landlord,the curious onlooker and finally facing myself.
But then somewhere its the toughest.
Knowing when you are all good but being in the few who got laid Off or rather FIRED.
I knew I would never feel bad or sad or torn or broken cause I knew it never was my fault.
But then the GLOOM came.It writhed,cried,shouted spread its shroud and came for me.It stuck my love first and then my friends and all those who were in this layoff wonderfully called as sabbatical.
I knew one day this would happen.One day all my loved ones,those who cared for me would be in shambles because of this situation.
But I knew I would fight all cause I had no choice of sitting and crying.There is this wonderful crux in life.You come out at your best after a head on collision.Sounds absurd but thats it.
I knew one thing that if there is anyone who would KNEEL,it would be life and not me,and I made it sure enough.
I called my friends who were in the same boat as me.And together we saw the new hope that seemed so clear,which was always there but never visible.
I had found a body to my dreams.Finally I could opt for higher studies that I had been waiting for so long.
There is this wonderful way of making ourselves happy.We say all happens for a reason,all happens for good.Although we just settle down with the newer things and console ourselves.But still it is essential as it keeps us the way we are,else we would have lost long back.
All is transparent now,specklessly transparent and I am here standing in arms,arms wide spread.
I have withered one more storm.Come life I am ready with my sword.
HIT ME

One last time

Caught in a snare
Besides the cradle

Even being a rat
I writhed like a snake

Damn these humans
I knew so well
Damn their ways
which I had seen so well

my last escape had been so perfect
missing the snare by inches of neglect
I knew that I wont come back
I knew I wont let my greed attack

Oh these people
who are smart like hell
Oh my glutton
it overcame even death lull

Stupid stomach
see what you have done
Stupid brain
why din't you intervene

Bloody cheese
what makes you so wanted
Bloody cheese
what makes you enchanted

I forgot that I have a head to save
I forgot that there are things so strange
for which even the stomach should wait

But what can I do to cry for the past
I can just wait till my last breath lasts

Oh here he comes with a brick so big
In a few minutes I would be reduced to wick
I am closing my eyes with all my strength
Cause I just can't see him squashing my health

Hey whats happening
I still am safe
Hey the child is laughing
from the confines of the cradle

The man is watching at the child so pure
A smile is pouting at the man who had an evil galore

He is opening the snare for me
He is helping so that I be free

What a perfect escape
for my chance to run
I would never come back
for the greed so big

so off I go
with my saved head
so off I go
for a life so good

But hey let me just take the cheese
one last time
let me just take the cheese
one last time
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Life is so analogus to this rat's tale.
We mostly mess up things by going the wrong ways,following vices,evils and end up at the wrong place.
But life gives us chances to come out of everything,to start afresh.
But as Captain Patch says:
"Habit is the second nature of man.
A dew rain drops,a few intimidations are enough for us to fall back and give in to those vices."
But thats where the test comes,to stay away from that enchanted block of cheese,to stay away from listening to the stomach.
Although sounds right and logical but as Max payne says:
"Logic IS the biggest liar".
I couldn't agree to him more.
So might be one last time....

Written for 3ww.The words being:Cradle,Perfect,Snare

~Harsha

Dilemma

Sitting at the tip of my bed I couldn't do much rather than hearing to the perennenial onslaught of the daylong drizzle that had been reverbrating through the day.

Watching the rain drip through the windows, I turned back.

Turned back to be caught in her hypnotic gaze.A split second and I felt as if I was lost in her.

With riots playing havoc outside when she knocked at my door for safety I couldn't say no.

Now as we both were stranded in my house,I wasn't able to say much.

Wasn't able to quiet understand when the world was sulking over stupid matters of religious orthodoxy how could I be lost in a complete world of my own.

Finally tried to tell her what I had been feeling inside.

But no it wasn't the right time,as she was vulnerable today.The horrifying scenes of people trying to rape her were stilll fresh from yesterday.

I would surely say what I had kept inside me for years,but maybe someday when she would be angst free,free to laugh, free to follow her heart.

Someday when she would be in her full strength to contemplate rather than to hear with fear.

Till then I would just take care of her.

Written for 3ww -Drip,Hypnotic,Sulk

~Harsha

Homosexuality

As the world witnessed
the fall of articles
the angst of religions
the collapse of narrow mindedness

We stood together
together in pain
together in love

The pain that I had to live
for the love so sweet
The answers that I had to give
for the questions so queer

Criminal I was called
for what I liked in my bed
Rebel i was labelled
for showing the love in my head

Am I questioned only because
our sex is same
Am I questioned only because
I am a One called a GAY

Is that a crime
to yearn for my love
Is that a crime
to marry one with feelings so same

Yes I couldnt love another girl
Like you all did
Yes I couldnt cheat another person
Like many of you did
My love was pure
And I was so sure

So we waited and waited
Till people serenaded
lovers eloped and hated
But we still waited and waited

To let my family know
that my love for you is real
To let my society feel
That my feelings are not surreal

We had to fight all dear
We stood death threats
We stood years of lockup
We stood the distance
We stood all

To stand to see the new day
To stand to see the new life

Dear,now all know
that our love is real
Now all know
That its not mad to love like this
Its not an illness to kiss like this

We needn't be ashamed
We needn't be labelled hideous
Coz now all know that our love is for real
Our love is for real

This weeks 3ww being-Collapse, Sweet, Yearn


Written  keeping in view the change in Article 377 in INDIAN constitution.
Now Homosexuality is not considered as a crime as it was earlier labelled.
This one is for freedom of choice,freedom of not being booked for what you do in your bed,
freedom for not being punished for your sexual preferences.

~Harsha

Do I want to be happy or sad:) :(

There are a lot many things that make you sad,
melancholy but at the same time there are thousands that make you happy wonderful
joyous.

You can feel sad for a lot many things you losing a job,your break up,misery of a friend,illness,world peace,politics imbroglio,terrorism downpour,u losing ur wallet,
missing the bus,not finding the pen.........

And feeling happy too is as easy.
It can be as simple a thing as the the young kid playing,the breeze blowing the rain pouring,the family talking,your love waving..............

The key here is to catch things that make you happy and concentrate on them rather then mourning on the sad ones.

I feel wonderful by blogging tooooooooo
so here I m making myself happy again rather than choosing to mourn over my losses.


Harsha
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And yup joined technorati too to be more happy.A technical part;)
8g3rfx6ei7
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memento

A dangerous bond of
Self aroused interest
Candid smiles and chirpy frowns
Lost in you for days so long
You said U love
And I said I do

You showed me heaven
And heaven I saw
Together we entwined
We became one

A reason for my being
Came into being

But u cried and said
you had to go
I saw your face
With a restless pace
I saw you leave
But couldn’t let you go

The love and the feel
I will make it stay
Still feel your feel
Still cherish your smile
Our love will live
Yes in my womb it stands
All want it gone
But stay it will

In me you will stay
As my life at stake
As my love’s keepsake
Yes in me you will stay

The TIME has come

Stateless expressions,logicless explanations.
These are my own ways for not writing,not talking,not shouting.
But there is something today that just wants me to write.
And that's the very same place which I left 6 months back.
For a new project,for a new opportunity for further movement.
But sometimes it feels as if we end at the same point,at square null.
I am again shot at point blank range with gargoyles of intermittent complexities.
Project is over now,company is in shambles now.
And now I see that there is some other thng that I want to follow.
Although it was damn clear,always crysal clear.
But now thw time has come to break the shackles of constraints,to break the shambles that blocked my moves.

Coz now the tym has come to a halt.
If only I clear these rigmaroles,then only I wud move.
Then only I will move.


Now,I have restructured my priorities,my goals,which always were there.
But now I have to move from where I started
from square null.....


~Harsha