Tuesday, November 17, 2009


"Cyclone 'phyan' about to hit Mumbai."

Scrolled through the news and knew that it would surely hit my place too.
But right now the climate is pleasent.
A dark stretch of clouds has gobbled up the city.
I know deep down that I have never ever woke up to find such a lovely morning.

The hues are blurred and so is the mind.

From what my eye can see the whole horizon is painted with the quick hands of an artist who is so at ease but also so at hurry.
He initially plans to have the lovely shades from his glistening pastel colors.
But with quick strokes he makes it all look a bit of color stroked thru a camelhair tipped brush.
Thick at the start but lighter at the end.
But somehow in middle of the act he finds it awkward and he is replacing the blue clouds with uneasy strokes of mixed black while I look at awe and more in wonder the speed of his work.
Coloring has never been my forte and hence I refrain from giving him much suggestions although I prefer lesser delusions than myriad mixtures.
While he works I am chuckling at the wonderful wind blowing right through my hair.
Now how many times does it happen that on such a wonderful morn you are holding a superb cup of tea on the balcony of a 10th floor and that too completly immersed in nature.
I think and rethink that how on earth can climate be so wonderful.
Slowly it starts to rain.Its more of a drizzle.The aroma of raindrops combined with sand give me the most refreshing feeling ever.
I also understand know that why such season is the perfect time for copulation(pretty coarse:P).
Just to have a quick world view I come inside wade through my mails my study material and the numerous social sites and networks.
I switch on the TV for an instant:"Cyclone 'Phyan' wind's clocked at 90 km/hr and the winds are estimated to grow."
I switchoff the idiot box and enjoy the tremendous gush of wind pressing itself through the windows literally threatning to break the house.
Bah,social networking.Studies,humbug.
Just watching the best forms of nature playing the seduction dance.
I can myself feel the mystic intimacy of the winds and clouds right out of my window.
I very well know they wont approve me of watching them in their act and that too so deeply engrossed.
I want to take my eyes off but more the forbidden a thing is more beautiful it becomes.
I was still thinking was it a voyeurism I was enjoying or is it the wonderful nature.

And suddenly a fluttering pigeon almost misses my windw.
It somehow finds a hold and rests on my window sil.
With wings tattered and an expression that it has gone through hell doesn't bring any more happiness to my life.
I wait with my stifled breath cause I know even a single movement of mine would frighten the poor creature and its miniscule seconds of relief too would be eaten.
Suddenly,I see my friend enter the room.And before I can stop him the poor bird sensing danger flies away.
I can do nothing except see it fly into winds flowing with a rage of 90 km/hr.
I can see it going back to a place which was once its nest its home.
A place few hours back from where it left its kids to bring back food to feed the wide mouths.
Still knowing that death might strike it cause they do not need a meterological survey to tell them that a cyclone is about to hit.
But to feed its baby birds it goes into the wild daring 'Phyan' itself.
And I know if it goes back it would find its kids crushed under a tree and if not crushed then dead because of squeaking helplessly on the ground with water drowning them.
And all of this If it goes back at all..........
The climate which seemed so beautiful to me has such a monstrous side that I never ever could notice.
The fun,the pleasent weather that I was enjoying was the cause of floods at other's place.
The copulation that I was enjoying was destroying habitats,killing families,devouring lives.
How could I be so engrossed in my pleasures that I could never see the gory details etched otherwise.

Sadly,one last time I switch on the TV:
"Cyclone 'Phyan's course diverted from Mumbai,now heading towards Gujarat".

Does it matter anymore....


Friday, November 13, 2009

Should I stop asking...

How much more pain would we succumb to hear the first voice of glory.

When to end is more important than to keep continuing.
This is one important thing that I have not known till now.

A blotch in a relationship can be overlooked or rather let the whole relationship be a blotch.

When the evasive dreams should be evaded to see them convert into reality.

Dark hues are a part and parcel of the life or they are just colors of one mind.

How dirty is really dirty.

Can a lie today be said to abstain from saying a bigger lie tommorow.

Can sex be considered god.Is sex before marriage right.

When would we stop being religious fools.

When would people stop infanticide.

When would the pedophiles rest.

When would we not throw rubble on another person because of how we see him than what he is.

When would I wake up and feel-Yes,this was something that I had waited for my whole life.

When would I stop being in a self dilemma when I refuse to give alms to beggers but later help them at an NGO.

When would I feel balanced.

When would I be able to give back to society what I have got and does that include the negativity too.

When would I be able to make my parents proud.

When would I stop asking questions...

P.S:Not putting a question mark may be grammatically incorrect but putting one would have been morally wrong.


Thursday, November 12, 2009

where is the flow dude

Inactivity is the crux of idleness or rather they are cyclic.
On a day when I can type a thousand mails have a hundred words and swear million swears,not writing doesnt sound right.
I should and must write cause it is something that gives me pleasure.
I don't want to sound utilitarian but still pleasure to mind is rather what keeps our mind healthy.
Wishing to be a great writer doesnt mean just seeing the great writer in you.
It also means bringing him out.
So, I must at least pen down at times or the passion myt be burnt somewhere.(Atleast that hasn't happened till now but who knows ).
One transformation I have noticed through these times of inactivity.
Initially the thing that very much  kept me writing was accolades too.
May it be in any form:-comments,followers,mentions.
I know it is sad as well as bad.
But thankfully I have passed these phases,now I stand at a place where what matters to me is freeing myself and hence thats the reason I would write from now on.
i dunno whether I wud b writing things as polished as before but yes I would be writing.
Hey m relieved and yes I am :)
PS:-And yes there are special friends whose remembering me rekindles the fire.
U knw it ryt:)




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